If only I could cry or riot

So my son comes in the house last night and says–“Ha Ha dad, mom got pulled over and she didn’t get a ticket”  He finds this funny because everytime his dad has ever been pulled over except one lousy time I have gotten a ticket. I think there needs to be riots and looting performed by men everywhere at this injustice. This injustice has been a constant since the invention of the automobile and the police car.  It is sexual profiling in the worst form–I am glad my wife did not get a ticket(more on that later), but I am sick of hearing the stories from women everywhere about how they only got a warning. My last ticket I had a legitimate excuse and he still didn’t care because, I couldn’t cry on cue and I have small breasts.

I speed and I accept most tickets I get, I fully understand the consequences for my actions. This is not the problem. I am not a murderer or rapist or other awful thing(politician), I am just someone who occassionally speeds, it’s ok to let me off with a warning every once in a while, just sayin

So the 2nd part of this problem is the police officer in this instance.  One of Elko’s finest.  This is the same guy who a month ago decides that the 15 cars parked along the side of the road outside the Elko baseball game need to be moved. It’s Tuesday night in Elko. There are like 5 cars that are going to be passing by and both lanes are wide open.  Most of the cars belonged to the players playing the game.  He refused to hear reason from all that spoke to him about his stupidity and warns that tickets will be issued in 10 minutes to all cars not moved.  I and the entire group of assembled fans thought this to be completely unbelievable and reluctantly all but 1 car were moved.  The poor umpire who could not leave the game was given a ticket–he was really a horrible law breaker wasn’t he.

So last night my wife is coming home from church with Justin(no lie, really church) and she stops–yes stops– at a useless stop sign in our neighborhood.  She saw the cop ahead of time so she stopped fully(not that she wouldn’t have if she didn’t see him).  He pulls her over and claims she did not stop the complete motion of the car.  Stop the complete motion–REALLY.  It’s a power and control thing–no ability to use common sense, stupidity, etc.  It’s 9pm, a car stops or almost stops with no other vehicles around in an empty neighborhood, and you find the need to pull over a mother and son on their way home from church,  THIS DUDE IS A PROBLEM–we gave this idiot a gun and a badge, when all he has ever gotten from others is wedgies, swirlies and kick me signs on his back.  We live in the middle of nowhere for a reason–leave us alone please– find people’s cats, catch speeders, catch people driving slow in the left lane, burglars, hell catch the people who keep ripping stuff off from cars–Just leave women coming home from church stopping at stop signs alone you idiot. I encourage the neighborhood to riot with me at 8pm at the little park,  if I’m late start without me:)

Why is noone rioting in front of the NFL offices, why are the same people upset last month in Missouri not just as upset this week. A woman and a child were both beaten in seperate instances by two very powerful men. Why aren’t those same people as upset?  Why aren’t they pouring into the streets in defense of women and children? Never mind I guess, carry on world

Sorry I lost my focus there for a second.  Hockey tryouts are coming soon.  Can hardly wait to talk my wife off the ledge for 10 days as she is hitting refresh on the browser every 10 seconds. OK I do it too.  It’s a stressful time that shapes the next 5 months of our lives. It’s not about the kids, it’s about which parents we get to hang out with:)  Now we get to stress about Allie too, as she is now trying out for a traveling level–Woohoo more tryout stress times 2.  I wish I was one of those people who ran things. Like stephon Marbury once said “some guys run their house and some guys run around their house”  He ran his house, I run around my house.  I wish I ran the tryouts–that would be way less stressful that’s all I’m trying to say.

School has started, I haven’t had any shifts yet. Hopefully that picks up soon, I’m nervous about it though. I’ve never taught in a classroom–hope I can get it right.  I got to go to Vegas with my mommy again, it was a blast–I didn’t win anything other than more great memories with my mom. I still love that place and can’t wait to go back already.

It has been reported daily to me that it is hunting season, by my son.  It has been reported to me by my father that my son may be afraid of his new 20 guage(see earlier facebook video of said son shooting his new 20 guage)  I have informed my son that being excited about hunting season, yet being afraid to shoot a gun really don’t mesh.  He trumped up all sorts of excuses as to why he didn’t shoot his gun, but none made sense.  I’m quite sure it is not a deep rooted love for game animals, I’m pretty sure he is ok with the death of mallards and geese(aren’t we all),  he however is not a fan of shoulder pain caused by the kick of a shotgun.  I have explained it comes with the territory and he must deal.

we all do realize that AP supposedly has 7 kids with  7 different women, right?  Flying into town to hand down discipline to “your” kids and flying back out of town doesn’t make you a father, right? When you are 6’1″ and 220lbs of pure muscle, you should not beat bloody 4 year old children, right?    just checking

Sorry, I slipped again–It’s coming–there was frost up north, I’ve been in a hockey arena twice a week for 3 weeks, my son has an urge to hunt and not do his math homework, the trees are about to lose their leaves, I am in need of happy pills, I cannot survive another one of these, happy pills are 12 ounces each, it’s so bad I even would be willing to move to Des Moines to get an extra 3 weeks of sanity, Justin would probably make the A team there, since who plays hockey in Des Moines really, I would live in Kansas City, Omaha, Tulsa, Topeka, and a whole host of other crappy little towns south of here just so you know.  They all have relief from winter at some point earlier than here, it snowed a foot in Calgary last week–last week was EARLY SEPTEMBER,  you don’t really think this winter is going to be any different do you?  Spray your aerosol cans outside please–open the hole

Justin wanted to join band and play the trumpet. Justin never plays his trumpet, he doesn’t really even bring it home, Allie flipped out when we made her use Justin’s recorder from 2 years ago instead of buying a new one, he never played that either, she is going to use her own money to buy one because she doesn’t like the color, I wonder if she will play hers, having kids play soccer, hockey, and baseball on Sundays makes it very difficult to follow football, I know nothing about football and my betting in Vegas proved that, the state fair makes no sense to me, why does it take so long to build the football stadium, too many union breaks I bet, I haven’t cried this month, it’s only half over, I get 2 nights alone with my wife next week, I CAN HARDLY WAIT, it’s been way too long since our last solo vacation, There is a squirrel stalking my grill, there is about to be 1 less squirrel in the Loer’s yard, it’s nice to drive without the threat of black ice, Mike Rowe is funny and kind of cool, read his facebook page it’s worth it, is it April yet–I am so not ready for the snowpile–please no, don’t let it happen

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