Where are the keys?

I know it’s been awhile and I should probably be full of witty and funny things that have happened, but I’m not really.  The weather being nicer takes a lot of the nasty bad attitude out of a guy.  However, it’s so stinking hot that it might as well be January.

It’s the rise of the machines around here lately.  The fridge still decides to quit working when it wants.  It used to give us 3 months or so between episodes, now we maybe get 3 weeks. we always notice it at like 10pm, so we get to rush all the food in the fridge and freezer out to the garage, it’s a blast, I love it.  Luckily it only lasts about 24 hours and then it starts to work again.  The dishwasher sounds like a 747 when it’s running, the wii just quit working, the lawn mower doesn’t start, the hot tub just cost us $500 to fix, and I think the snowblower probably won’t start in a month when it snows.

I hate the hot tub the most out of those things. I don’t like to be hot as much as I don’t like to be cold.  So sitting in steaming hot water that smells like chemicals isn’t my favorite thing to do.   It will surely take about $400 out of our pocket every 12-18 months. If you are thinking of getting a hot tub, don’t do it they are a black hole.  Now the K won’t work on my keyboard, I have to smash it to get it to work.

We haven’t had a fire all year in our wonderfully expensive fire pit.  It was too cold, too wet, too full of mosquitos, too hot, too windy, we were gone, etc.  Now it will soon be winter, and I can hardly wait. I guess my attitude isn’t that much better

I get to be on a plane twice in the next 3 weeks.  Jen and I are going to Chicago with friends and we will be watching the Bears/Bengals game. I’m not all that excited about watching the Bears play football, but I am excited to get out of dodge with my wife for a few days. We really travel well together and we operate really well without kids. No problems in the children afterlife for us, we will do just fine.  Love my kids and look forward to the next 10 years, but that doesn’t at all mean I don’t look forward to 10 years from now either.

The next time on a plane is to Oregon to go fishing for Salmon in the Columbia River.  2 days on the coast fishing for crab and Salmon and then 2 days guided on the Columbia for Salmon and Walleyes. I am not sure I have ever been this excited for a trip. I think I might be scaring Redmond with how obsessed I have become about fishing. I watch Salmon videos on youtube all the time, and videos from crab pots underwater has become my new favorite.

I bought a new $200 driver and it really did me no good, other than to make me look a little cooler, but I’m so far gone on that it really isn’t noticeable.  It still goes straight right, but just like my other one it hits straight down the middle of the range.

I just got a statement from a bank account that I thought I had closed. It had $135 in it, you would have thought I had won the lottery.  Unlike my wife, I don’t misplace money.  I never find money in pants pockets or jacket pockets, she does all the time.  She also locks keys in cars or loses them, leaves credit cards at stores, etc.  I’m thinking if she got alzheimers it would be an improvement.  So I got to know the feeling that she has when she finds things that you should never have lost and it was awesome. It isn’t a lot of money, but it was such an awesome feeling. I think she might do it on purpose to get that awesome feeling  you get when someone calls from target and says “Jennifer, we have your iphone and credit card here.”  It’s an addiction and she can’t control it, I GET IT NOW. I hope there are more bank accounts out there, but I know I am not that lucky and $135 is definately the most that could possibly be in it.

The day baseball ended, football began and the day football ends is the same day that hockey tryouts begin. In September Justin has football or hockey every single day and both on Saturday. Allie has soccer 3 times a week and hockey 3 days as well. I think it’s going to be a long fall.  Can’t wait for hockey to start so our schedule clears up :).  Football for 10 year olds is brutal. Nobody gets anywhere. His first game ended 0-0 and both teams managed 1 first down.  It was 900 degrees and there are no shade trees by a football field. 10 year olds have no desire to block, they all just want the ball.

Justin is obsessed with deer hunting, I am not. I have no desire to shoot another deer as long as I live. Mostly because I don’t want to deal with the deer after I shoot it. I live in a suburban neighborhood and drive a car. What the hell am I supposed to do with a bloody dear carcass? He is threatening to quit hockey so he can deer hunt and duck hunt more.  I get the desire for duck hunting, but convincing a 10 year old that now is the time to chase balls/pucks/girls and not deer and ducks is harder than I thought.  He is a different creature than most kids his age though. He is not at all caught up in the things that some of his friends are and he just plain doesn’t think about it.  I used to be able to do both when I was young, but today’s obsession with youth sports makes it much more difficult than it was when I was young.

Construction is in full swing and we are officially blocked in down here in Elko. Nobody cares, but our lives are going to suck for the next 2 months. It’s the not knowing when you make that innocent turn onto 35 North.  It could take you 45 minutes to get to Lakeville or it could take you 4 minutes, you never know.  It’s so exciting each time I leave the house, wondering what the drive holds for me.  Will 35 be one lane, will 494 be down to one lane, who knows and so much anticipation, it’s just too much excitement for one person.

I despise most politicians, I think the world needs more Dexters, Chicago hotels are too expensive, golf costs too much, Organized religion has lost it’s way, God has not, Schools need more funding, Big oil does not, niether side cares to fix it, one is not better than the other don’t fall for that trap, The Vikings are going to be good, build the stadium already, Cheerios are boring, Groupon saves me money sometimes, I want to go to Vegas really bad, it’s not going to happen for awhile, my wife is awesome and so are my kids, fantasy football has begun, I like my team so it is doomed to fail, stay out of the left lane–it’s for passing, Allie needs to brush her hair more often, Justin needs to pick his nose less, I need to eat less and excercise once, I would say excercise more, but that would imply that I do at all, the squirrel is dead, we need rain, it won’t happen until it’s snow not rain, Justin is obsessed with wearing Jerseys, he wants a Russell Wilson jersey, but they are too expensive new and he outgrows them so fast, it is my job to judge whether the player who he wants won’t turn out to be a murderer or drug addict, Russell Wilson seems safe, Who really is safe anymore, I am trying to judge less harshly, I give up, I hope Taylor Swift grows up soon or goes away for awhile, she dances funny, the mallards will be here soon, I wish they wouldn’t come so soon, kids can be akward,


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